This was a great movie to kick off the 2024 Countdown to Christmas, even if it’s mid-October and my house is decorated for Halloween. It’s sweet and funny, but there is one clear reason why: Amy Groening. I’ve seen her in Santa Summit, sharing the female co-starring role with two others and as a secondary character in several other Hallmark movies. But this is the first lead role I’ve seen her in. Forgive me if it’s not the first. She’s excellent. Often we have Hallmark female leads who are a bit—how do I put this nicely—stiff. Groening is anything but stiff. She’s playful and funny, and easy to root for.
This is my definitive ranking of the 27 Hallmark Channel movies I reviewed in 2023. From the “Holly Hallmark Best Movies” to the “Coal in your Stocking” worst.
There is an argument to be made that this 2024 Hallmark Christmas movie is the most boring movie of the season, and I’ve seen a few reviews to that effect. Maybe I was in the right mood. Or maybe it’s because several members of my family also were drawn into the story, and sat down with me to watch. In any case, this little Irish tale was quite enjoyable with its simple and leisurely pace that focused on a small village in Ireland.
3 stars. A waste. I’ll never get this time back
This film uses the joining of two families over Christmas to rerun the Meet the Parents theme, while showcasing Indian celebrations of the holiday.
Ultimately dry and lifeless, this effort is not worth your time. I felt uncomfortable for our leads for having such annoying families who spoke in long, robotic and way-too-complete complete sentences.
One bright side, our leads. They could have carried the movie alone, had they not been busy playing caricatures of “regular white guy” and “modern Indian woman.”
Change the channel on the Singhs.
Measuring Christmas magic: no magic, but good representation of Indian culture.
Cast Kudos: I’d like to see Anuja Joshi (Asha) given another lead role, but with less responsibility than representing the entirety of her culture.
Alternative titles: Christmas engagement clash; Blending Culture Christmas
Four stars: Not good. Sad face.
Despite featuring new era Hallmark royalty, this Amazing Race style ripoff fails to capture any semblance of Christmas magic and manages to force a relationship upon us–and the lead characters–that no one wants.
Much like a half marathon that seemed like a good idea when I signed up, I had no interest in finishing the race or this movie. Alas, I trudged through every beautiful, but unremarkable scene.
You know from the beginning that this movie has a bigger budget than a normal Hallmark movie based on the graphics, superior lighting and multiple locations (all though they all look a little like basic Canada). So my hopes were high, but it did not last more than five minutes into the movie.
Our lead, Ashley Williams, is an elementary school teacher whose only personality trait is that she likes to teach kids how to read. Andrew Walker is a shell of a former athlete who doesn’t know what to do after retiring from hockey. They both end up participating in a holiday themed game show where they race across the US (not Canada) to answer one question and complete one simple task at each place before magically moving onto the next city for another paint by numbers game show scene. They usually have time to sit by a fire too, and help you nod off.
The driving force behind this movie is the contest they are participating in, but as you would expect, the ”will they or won’t they” theme is needlessly thrust upon us. These two don’t need partners to have fulfilling lives. Honestly, they seem pretty good single. Why mess up a good thing?
From the promotions, I expected this movie to be funny, like the Santa Summit, or Haul out the Holly, but it fails at every turn. Pass on this one.
Questions I still have:
Why is the movie called Jingle Bell Run, when the show is The Great Holiday Dash? And they never once say “Jingle Bell Run.” Trademark issue? Major issue here.
Why are there never any cameras filming them doing anything? There is a hot hockey guy painting a picture from scratch? Nope. No camera guy caught that for the show! It’s small, but the Amazing Race producers must have been choking on their eggnog.
Measuring Christmas Magic: none, despite being focused on a game show that features only holiday traditions.
Cast kudos: none. Don’t watch this movie.
Alternative movie titles: The Great Holiday Dash (duh); Forced to Be on a Game Show; finally—Help my friend signed me up for this and I never met the producers until day 1 of filming (ok, that one may be too long, yet no less accurate.)
8 stars. Really good. Would Recommend it.
Olivia (Erin Krakow) gets her big break as a TV home designer for a holiday makeover on Christmas Eve, she’s stunned that the network hires Chris (Daniel Lissing) to oversee the TV and live reveal on Christmas Eve. Throw in a magic (and changing) letter from the real Santa that says her true love is named Nick and she has to find him by Christmas, well hijinks ensues.
This sounds a lot more complicated than it is. And to be honest, I had extremely low expectations for this one. The trailer and commercials were awful. Having a lead interested in three Nicks (and a Chris) is not my thing, but they play it cool and funny. Olivia proceeds to give different Nicks a concussion, black eye and for good measure, poison another one. The Nicks woo Olivia hard, and all seem nice, yet she’s not all in, despite spending all of her free time on dates during the biggest moment of her career. Yes, she just might have a better connection with another fella—the aforementioned Chris (if that is your real name).
Despite my best efforts to not like this movie, they turned me. It was good. While it did seem like they crunched three or four different holiday themes into one movie, somehow it works, and I had more fun that I could have anticipated in this fast-paced movie. Yes, fast-paced . . . a Hallmark movie. What is the world coming to?
Goofy notes
Stop trying to make Seattle snowy. It ain’t a thing.
The train in the final scene is leaving for Spokane, Washington. Hello, my hometown.
Three weeks to fix a house is the least believable thing in this movie. They film Hallmark movies in the summer so they can be ready by winter. Seriously?
Dating three or four people at the same time is never a good idea.
If the Nicks do get their own dating show, I would watch that.
Measuring Christmas Magic: Yes, a magic letter from Santa is key. Plus taking a horse drawn carriage across Seattle in less than nine minutes on Christmas Eve is some kind of traffic magic.
Cast Kudos: Nick A (Benjamin Ayres). Who actually seems believable as a pediatric neurosurgeon.
Alternative Titles: So Many Nicks for Christmas; In the Nick of Time; Olivia Dates so many Nicks.
Originally aired on Hallmark on Nov. 9, watched Nov. 10.
Five stars: Nope. Background noise only
When students go home for Christmas break at a university in Vermont, those sad souls left behind (or just live there), participate in a 45-year tradition of Christmas trivia at Nick’s Bar. Celeste (Tammin Sursok) is obsessed with winning the trivia tournament, but is thrown when her ringer bails and she’s stuck with Max, a football coach (Brant Daugherty) as their sixth and required member of the trivia team.
Trivia is fun, but this movie was absurd and not in a funny, laugh at yourself way. There are some funny one-liners, but it’s certainly not enough to carry the contrived story line that somehow tries to be funny and sincere, but fails at both.
One liners
-I’m a football coach, not a wheel magician!” When he can’t change a tire.
-“If you’d like, I’d be happy to share my syllabus…” Professor, keep your pants on. Really a dick joke?
-After asking a nun to be on the trivia team, the nun replies, “I will pray for you. Hard.” Wow, the nun thinks you’re silly.
-“Belay! You gotta Belay!” Best rock-climbing advice ever.
Goofy notes
A whole week of trivia nights is a bit much, even for die hard trivia buffs.
This movie was filmed on location in Connecticut. Why was it placed in Vermont?
Shouting your trivia answers in a crowded bar is a great way to lose to other people who can hear you.
Everyone drinks different colorful holiday beverages – no one has any ice.
The Stan trophy had to be worth at least $7, but no more.
And who was Stan in the photo? They show him like an inside joke. Help us out.
When they eat cookies, the sound department didn’t add the ever-present crunch, like every other Hallmark movie. This is the right decision.
Measuring Christmas Magic: None, except the super meta final trivia category – Hallmark Christmas movies! Nice work there.
Cast Kudos: Brian McCarthy who plays Nick the Quiz Master. Nick dons a different holiday outfit each night, which helps show the different events, and is a nice running joke. Give Nick a movie.
Alternative Titles: The Greatest Trivia Tournament Ever; Trivia for the Lonely; Just go home for the Christmas holiday.
Aired on Hallmark on Nov 8, watched Nov. 9.
7 stars. Enjoyed it.
Recent retiree Barbara (Beth Broderick) joins the town’s Christmas Committee to keep herself busy, but immediately clashes with Kath (Caroline Rhea). Barbara is stiff, on time and a wiz in a spreadsheet. Kath is a free spirit, and a bit nutty, but also full of Christmas joy. They both just so happen to have young, single children. The moms use an app for parents to match their kids (terrifying). Yes, the kids match on the app and quickly in real life.
This movie really focuses on two relationships, but in a unique way. In a shared A/B story, the mom’s relationship from enemies to friends, and the kid’s story from “fake dating” to actually dating take nearly equal screen time.
The chemistry between Beth Broderick and Caroline Rhea is wonderful, obviously from their years of working together as aunts on Sabrina the Teenage Witch. They couldn’t have found better actors to take on these roles. Very authentic ribbing and timing.
Our romantic leads are Shane (Jon McLaren) and Lauren (Maxine Denis). They are great together and could have held the full focus of the story with more material.
My major nitpick is the fake dating. After Shane and Lauren go on a real date together, they decide to flip the script and fake date to get their parents to stop setting them up with people (which we never see happen by the way). There is no logical (or Christmas Magical) reason to make this decision. Just date, you hot people! That’s the way to go. The parents would have stopped meddling if you were really dating, and you definitely liked each other, so do that.
It’s refreshing to see Lauren working hard as a co-owner of her architecture firm and trying to get a project done. So often in Hallmark, we’d see her trying to get a promotion from a male CEO, or ice queen boss over Christmas. They also give a realistic reason why the building work needs to get done by the end of the year—building code changes on Jan. 1. I don’t know if it exactly works like that, but I applaud the effort.
Goofy notes
Only one “witch” reference in the whole movie. I expected more.
“Tying a dead plant to a car” is an interesting way to describe taking a Christmas Tree home.
I need more of the Christmas rat. This seemed so whacky, and it worked because Shane was really all of us in that situation.
Shane’s theater has a full kitchen behind the seating area, and they don’t shut off the lights during a performance. Hmm, I wonder why they are struggling.
When you do karaoke for “Jingle Bells” you probably don’t need to stare quite so intently at the words on the screen.
Trolly caroling isn’t a thing. Is it? Let’s get in a wooden bench trolly and hold fake sheet music and sing so nobody else can hear us.
Why are we always Christmas caroling? Singing did not need to happen this much.
Cast kudos: This is a slam dunk-- Beth Broderick and Caroline Rhea.
Alternative titles: Full Sabotage Christmas; Meddling Moms Christmas; UnMatched for Christmas
Originally aired on Hallmark Nov. 3; watch Nov. 7.
Six stars. Solid. Could be better
When you already know the ending of the A story, the movie needs to do a good job of showcasing the journey, since the destination is already set. Our Holiday Story brings us on this journey, but the stakes are low and does only a passable job at entertaining along the way.
The A story is the retelling of how Dave (Warren Christie) and Nell (Nikki DeLoach) met 8 years earlier. When we first meet them they are together, married and parents. They are asked to retell this mild tale by the boyfriend of Dave’s daughter, who missed a train, forcing her boyfriend to meet the dad and step mom alone.
If the story focused on their nearly decade old romance alone, we’d be in for a snoozefest, but never fear, the B story is here! Johanna (Sydney Scotia) and the aforementioned boyfriend Chris (Gavin Langelo) are having trouble (sorta) expressing their very strong and lasting love for eachother, because you know . . . when you really love someone in that mutual way, the real trouble is saying it . . . right?
Throw in a job title of comptroller, a Christmas festival, lots of talk of fruit cake and ugly sweaters, missed trains, dead phone batteries, and missed opportunities– oh, and constantly lying and you have the makings of a low stakes, albeit sweet movie.
Cast Kudos: 9 stars for Sydney Scotia. She plays 16 and 24 (I think), well and differently. She’s just a joy to watch in this movie because she’s so happy with a great smile, but then things go south and you can feel that too.
Alternative titles: A Christmas of Missed Chances; How a Comptroller stole Christmas; Meet the Christmas Parents.
Originally aired Nov. 2 on Hallmark. Watched Nov.
Each holiday movie will receive a rating by stars.
5 stars. Nope. Background noise only.
A final singing number, which is quite catchy and fun, was not enough to save this Broadway dud from getting cancelled from my theater list. Our leads, Violette (Ginna Claire Mason) and Alex (Jordan Litz) work at as singing servers in New York. They have dreams of making it big on Broadway and we’re supposed to be rooting for them.
The trouble is the Cyrano de Bergerac storyline where Alex feeds his cousin Brad (Gino Anania) all the info on Violette and somehow almost wins her over with his yule log (don’t ask, it ain’t sexy). As expected, it all comes crashing down.
Not to put too fine a point on this whole thing, but Brad is the worst. We could have had a helpless in love guy in this part, but he’s made to be an absolute fool and a pure annoyance to everyone who knows him. Not loveable, but quite creepy. This character rips a star or two off this movie.
I enjoyed Mason in A Holiday Spectacular (2022, 6 stars) and the under appreciated A Heidelberg Holiday (2023, 7 stars). When she sings the final song, it’s magic, but when she’s made to sing public domain holiday songs, it’s a waste.
Litz too, is better than the material he’s given. Let the man sing! I see leading man for many years to come, if given the right material.
Cast Kudos: Hallmark veteran John B. Lowe in a cameo as the glitzy producer. Love that guy.
Alternate titles: Christmas comes to Broadway. Cast for Christmas. Singing for supper.
Originally aired on Hallmark Nov. 1, 2024. Watched Nov. 2, 2024
7 stars. Enjoyed it.
In the 5-Year Christmas Party, two theater majors spend 5 consecutive Christmases in each other’s lives, acting out the highs and the lows of post-college. Unlike many Hallmark movies where a single act of kindness means forever love, this tale is grounded in the realities of real life. Things like jobs, family and dreams matter to the leads, and guide their decisions on relationships or other commitments. Aside from an ending that leaves a bit too much to the imagination, this is a solid, non-Old School Hallmark movie that I would recommend.
Our lead is Katie Findlay, who plays Alice, who really wants to make it in theater as a director. Our leading man is Jordan Fisher, who plays Max, an aspiring actor. Kudos all around. These two are great together and definitely play different versions of themselves over the course of 5-years. Success or failure is subtle, but they showcase the differences well.
Credit to writer Zag Hug, a Hallmark vet, who also wrote the Ghosts of Christmas Always (9 stars), which is one of the best Hallmark movies of all time
Major kudos to production on this one. Clearly on a budget, we re-use the same party house, kitchen, party venue, alley, parking lot and rooftop—and some of the same actors every year. They dress them up a little (emphasis on little) bit differently each time, but it’s reminiscent of a play where moving a chair or changing the lighting signals a different act. Also, the changing of the season montages were great.
This movie is more sincere than fun, which means realistic laughs, love and tears.
Goofy notes
They really hate catering the law firm Christmas party. I need to know more!
Forcing people to become carolers is not a real thing and nobody should do that.
I think Jordan Fisher must be wearing lifts, right? He’s great, but she’s pretty tall
They make a joke about oranges and scurvy. I don’t think it landed, but I applaud the effort.
I love that they bonded over watching Ashley Williams (Hallmark) movies. Meta!
I feel like these long gaps between seeing each other could have meant they might find another person to love. If I got ghosted for a year, I would probably not be so happy to see the person who did me dirty.
What happened between Daniel (Jeff Avenue) and Micah (Olly Atkins)? They were together for years 2-4, then Micah is MIA in year five? Come on Hallmark. You gave us a gay couple and then didn’t stick the landing. Where’d he go?
Cast Kudos: The really, really bad mustache on Jeff Avenue for year 4. Just no.
Alternative titles: The show must go on, for 5-years; Catering my life story; Christmas Party Again; Alice and Max take the long way to love.
Originally aired on Hallmark Oct. 27; watched Nov. 1.
Six stars: Solid. Could be better.
Spoilers ahead
When librarian Whitney, accidently slips into a date with an undercover FBI agent who is trying to stop a jewel heist, she learns that she has more to offer than just fire-safety tips to kids at book readings. This caper flick is entertaining, funny and offers some actual emotions amongst the twisty hijinks.
Rachel Skarsten plays our lead, coupled with Josh (Corey Sevier), playing the exact same tired character he always plays. Sorry, not a fan. Skarsten was the Nanny in The Royal Nanny (2022), which was a dreadful movie where she plays MI5 agent, who has to become a nanny. I guess law enforcement is her typecast? But she’s very likeable in this one and surprisingly grounded. I’ll continue to watch her movies.
I called the bad guy from the minute we saw him, then turned out to be wrong. So, I love that I was fooled. Nice work there.
Goofy notes section
They go to a Christmas store, which might as well be Hallmark’s Christmas set decoration department to meet Mrs. Claus who makes jewelry as her side hustle. She needs “a few hours” to make an intricate replica necklace complete with a tracking device. Christmas magic anyone?
Whitney quotes Die Hard, while crawling through air vents. Then declares it the best Christmas movie ever. A bit on the nose, but I’m here for it.
The game night scene with the parents brings some actual emotion thanks to slow motion looks at our leading man, even if it is Sevier. Museum flag poles are very strong to hold two full grown adults. Bonus issue here—Josh doesn’t wear any hand protection while sliding down a rope for five or more stories from the rooftop.
The jewel thief made a curious choice by asking a stranger to help plan the event where she steals multiple artifacts.
Questions remaining
Was the thief’s hubby in on it, or just a finance guy?
Cast Kudos: The very brief appearance of Jefferson Brown, better known as Colton Landry from The Way Home. He plays an agent of some kind jumping from a roof in a TV movie Whitney watches in the opening of this movie. How is that for foreshadowing?
Alternative Titles: Steal the Heart of Christmas; FBI Blind Date; Stop My Parents are Retired FBI!
Originally aired Oct. 26 on Hallmark; watched Oct. 27.
Four stars: Not good. Sad face.
When a movie has the word “operation” in the title, it’s usually a sure bet that it will have some sort of detailed, military-style plan at the center of its plot. Not this movie. The operation is “let’s go look for a guy named Dave and keep missing him, because he has our nutcracker.”
In order for a charity ball to make enough money to build a new hospital wing, the nice rich folks are auctioning off an antique nutcracker. Yes, whatever someone will bid on this nutcracker will build an entire hospital in Boston. It’s so fancy in fact that it’s brought to Boston in a plain-Jane carry-on bag on a commercial flight. Oh, yeah, and it’s just wrapped in a towel—not locked case for protection. Oh, and our dopey leading man allows the bag to be checked and loses it. Yeah, this movie plot is not great.
A few things to watch for if you want to give it a go.
The fake beard on our leading man in the first act of the movie
The random men (I counted three) who are dancing/swaying alone in the final dance scene
On the nose mentions of meet-cute and rom-coms
Why is Ashley Newbrough always single? She seems so nice.
Cast Kudos: Nobody really stands out, but it’s interesting that Patrice Goodman and Darryl Hinds (Dave) both were secondary players in ‘Twas the Date Before Christmas. Which aired on Hallmark the weekend before this nutty movie.
Alternative Titles: What happens when you don’t use luggage tags; Hospital wings don’t cost a thing; Where’s Dave?; How to lose a Nutcracker in 7 days.
Aired: Oct. 25 on Hallmark. Watched Oct. 24.
Six Stars: Solid. Could be better.
Full disclosure—I was going to skip this one, but I’m glad I didn’t. Scouting for Christmas was a charming non-traditional family story. It didn’t break new ground but was perfectly enjoyable.
Ten-year-old Brooklyn (Audrey Wise Alvarez) is a Sunny Scout and loves baked goods and the guy who bakes them, Sir Bakes-A-Bunch, William (Carlo Marks). Brooklyn’s single mom Angela (Tamera Mowry-Housley), is a busy real estate agent who doesn’t like asking for help. She shows up late to things, which is apparently her worst quality as a human. Other than that, she’s pretty great.
Brooklyn and Angela enlist Sir Bakes-A-Bunch to audition to be the caterer/goodie table guy for the Sunny Scout holiday ball. The relationship building centers around that story line.
We also meet Dakota (James Paladino) who is Brooklyn’s dad, but I’m convinced he is 75% Philadelphia Phillies slugger Bryce Harper. Look him up, you’ll see it too.
The meanie is Den Mom Elizabeth (Jaycie Dotin). She is easy to root against in all things. She’s judgy and snooty to a “working” mom who can’t possibly be a good mom, work and show up to things on time.
This is set in Washington state. They keep showing images of snowy Seattle. That’s not really a thing. We have other cities here, too. Maybe visit Leavenworth if you need a snowy Washington town. Also, nobody here has ever said “tri-state area,” if anything they would say, “the Northwest” which covers Oregon, Washington and Idaho. Also, we drink coffee (home of Starbucks), not tea.
Funniest line: When Brooklyn is asked what she wants for Christmas, she replies that she wants her dad to come home and her mom to be fun. Brooklyn’s friend replies, “Whoa. That’s deep. I want an electric scooter.”
Cast Kudos: Brooklyn (Audrey Wise Alvarez). She’s a very good child actor who is really the driving force of the whole movie.
Alternative Titles: Those who bake a lot, love a lot; Sunny Scout Ball; A baker for Christmas; Christmas Matchmaker Meritt Badge
Originally aired on Hallmark Channel: Oct. 20. Watched: Oct. 26
Five stars: Nope. Background noise only
Two women who work at an “invitation store” (apparently that’s a thing) decide to steal leftover invitations and crash extremely elaborate holiday parties a few times because they think their lives are going nowhere. The party crashing isn’t even a main theme in the film. It just happens to be a thing they do. I am not recommending this movie, therefore this review contains spoilers.
Lyndsy Fonseca plays Toni, a law school grad, who had a panic attack when taking the Bar Exam and did not become a lawyer (yet). She lives with her invitation store co-worker and bestie Bri, played to perfection by Daniella Monet. Bri likes to organize and give advice–I guess that’s her talent..
Toni meets up with Justin (Chris McNally), who is the CEO of an investment company which apparently only has just one lawyer, one office and five or so actual employees. Toni and Justin, despite being model worthy folks, have absolutely no chemistry. Why do they like each other? What thing in Toni makes Justin a better man? What thing that Justin has, makes Toni change her ways. No growth. No good. I could go on about this storyline, but I just didn’t buy it. She’s a fake lawyer and it’s the end of the world for a while.
The secondary love story is way better. Bri meets a valet named Vinny (Jag Bal)who actually shows an interest in her and looks like he actually likes her. Our first couple should take note. They do some flirting and the big reveal is that he’s not a valet, he owns the company which may or may not be a big company. They never really say. But for fantasy sake, I’ll say he’s loaded. This couple actually gets married at the end of the movie. They are of Indian decent and Bri’s wedding dress is a chic Indian gown that was really great. I’d like to see this culture explored more in these movies. They do celebrate Christmas in India. Let’s look into that.
It feels like Hallmark had two OK movies and they decided to blend them together and make one janky movie. Bri and Vinny deserved to be the headline couple of this movie. Justice for Bri and Vinny!!
This movie was also not a Christmas movie. It takes place in the winter and people go to holiday parties, but it is not at all about Christmas. This movie fails the substitution test that tells us that if the holiday of Christmas featured in the movie could be swapped out for another holiday without material changes in the plot of said movie, then it’s not a Christmas movie. Adding snow, or mountains is not enough. Christmas doesn’t even occur in this movie. Huh?
There are no children in Holiday Crashers, despite having multiple pregnant women. Christmas joy is best seen through the eyes of children. Pretty single people don’t exude Christmas cheer like a kid.
The lawyer's TV advertisements were very funny. They played Sia’s song “Snowman,” which is one of the best Christmas songs ever made.
At one point in the film someone says, “Well, she did save us $2 billion.” This is not a normal thing to say, or a reasonable excuse for a lie.
This is the second year that Hallmark put Lyndsy Fonseca in a terrible movie. “Where Are You Christmas? (2023) was dreadful. But she starred in the wonderful “Next Stop, Christmas” (2022), so I’ll keep rooting for her. Come on Hallmark, help a girl out.
Cast Kudos: Credit to Jag Bal who plays Vinny. I need more Vinny. Genuine fella who you could bring home to the parents.
Alternative titles: Everyone Got a Sitter and Went to a Party; Fake Lawyer for Winter; I lied about being a lawyer, but I’ll save you $2 billion anyway; No Kids Christmas.
Aired on HallMark Channel: Oct. 19, 2024; watched Oct. 20, 2024
This was a great movie to kick off the 2024 Countdown to Christmas, even if it’s mid-October and my house is decorated for Halloween. It’s sweet and funny, but there is one clear reason why: Amy Groening. I’ve seen her in Santa Summit, sharing the female co-starring role with two others and as a secondary character in several other Hallmark movies. But this is the first lead role I’ve seen her in. Forgive me if it’s not the first. She’s excellent. Often we have Hallmark female leads who are a bit—how do I put this nicely—stiff. Groening is anything but stiff. She’s playful and funny, and easy to root for.
